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1. The wrong choice: continue to try and get money from your "friend" since you don't want to get him into trouble and keep quiet. Regardless of the fact that he hasn't held up his part of the bargain already, this is the wrong choice- he messed up your car, and someone's house. You are out a car, someone is fixing his house, and your "friend" isn't lifting a finger to help. Do what's right. 2. The right choice: call police/insurance and fess up. This is certainly the more difficult path because it is sure to make trouble for you as well. Do you have the title to the car? If there is a lien, then whoever has the lien is probably going to be pissed that you haven't gone to insurance to repair what they own. If you own it yourself, you are probably already on your own except for the fact that should the owner of the house find out it was your car, you are now liable. I would start protecting myself in this mess.
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